We are constantly under restoration and our hearts are always under construction. Sometimes, it takes a long process and at times our patience just runs out. Sometimes, we cannot comprehend why Jesus has to take so long in his restoration plans of our hearts.
So many of us carry baggage and wounds from life. We carry wounds from not being recognised, seen and accepted for who we are. We carry wounds from abandonment and rejection from people, loved ones and even friends. We carry wounds from our inadequacies and weaknesses and sins. We carry wounds from a loved one’s passing or a deep betrayal or a violation of trust from the people we thought we could trust. We carry wounds from comparing ourselves to others. We carry wounds from not being able to meet expectations. We carry wounds of regrets and shame. We carry wounds from being left out and for not belonging. Inevitably, we carry our wounds from the sins of ourselves and the sins of others that have been inflicted on us.
Sometimes we feel that the restoration of our hearts is impossible because of how wounded and broken our hearts are. Yet, we are not alone in sorrow and pain. We are never meant to carry these wounds alone because God wanted to carry and heal these wounds for us. God knows the pain in each of our hearts and is not indifferent to them.
Yet this restoration process is scary. In our fear of what God has done or might do, so many times we usher Him out of our hearts, so we can once again have control of it. We are afraid that our broken hearts left in His hands would again be broken just like before. And in all honesty, it is tough to allow Jesus to enter the doors of our hearts. It takes time to trust again, to trust Him again but I assure you that Jesus only wants the good for us.
Jesus continually searches and seeks for our hearts in every situation of our lives. Nothing happens that is beyond his knowledge and sight. Jesus is unafraid of our tombs and the secrets of the tomb. Sitting in pain does not mean you are resigning yourself to a life in pain. It does not make you seem weaker or it does not mean that you are giving up. To dare to sit in pain with Jesus means that you are ready to hear, to learn from the perfect healer.
Escaping and running away from issues would never heal the hurt. We must go to the cross with Him for true resurrection to take place. Running away from pain, suppressing it, avoiding it and numbing it is not going to ease it for you. In my life, I have done a fair share of running away and suppressing my pain, but I realised that it will come up in another way which is less preferred. The best way is to face it bravely with Jesus. Jesus invites each of us to sit with our pain and to acknowledge and accept the pain. Acknowledging the pain is allowing what is to be what it is.
Pay attention to the pain and to Jesus. Give it space to tell you its message and give yourself space for Jesus to tend to this pain. God will use that pain and turn it into something beautiful – in His time and in His space. Jesus remains faithful and He is going to follow through. He makes promises and is going to follow through with His promises. He promises more healing and restoration of your wounded heart.
Jesus has knit you in your mother’s womb and He was the one who created your heart. He who made your heart certainly knows how to heal it. Allow the perfect healer to put his healing hand gently to the areas of your heart that has been broken or devastated. Receive the healing that your heart is meant to have.
Healing and restoration take time – a lot of time really and a lot of God too. We are called and invited to be patient with the process of restoration. He makes all things beautiful in His time.
Recently, I have been watching a lot of Grey’s Anatomy and there was a scene that spoke out to me.
There was a fetus who was growing a mass on her heart, but she wasn’t full term yet, so the surgeons performed an open fetal surgery and it was extremely dangerous. But they did it anyway and took out the mass. It was successful at first after removing the mass but the fetus heart rate dropped really fast just before the surgeons could close the fetus up.
And everyone was panicking except the cardio-thoracic surgeon. All the other surgeons tried to make the cardio-thoracic surgeon act and do something, but she paused for a long time.
After a while, the cardio-thoracic surgeon said this: My plan is to give her another minute. Something huge has just been removed from her heart and she has this thing with her since day 1. Her heart just needs to learn how to beat without the extra load. She just needs a little time to adjust.
And exactly after one minute, the fetus heartbeat stabilises and the whole surgery was a success.
The restoration of our hearts also means daring to move with Jesus. He would take out the excess masses in our hearts, remove the damaged heart tissues and scar tissues. Just like the fetus, we sometimes need the extra minute, the time for our hearts to learn how to beat again without the extra load and for our hearts to adjust. We entrust the restoration of our hearts to Jesus – the perfect heart surgeon.
- Bernice Lee